Category Archives: Reviews

Book Review: Stolen

In mid July, I paid a visit to some family, that live in a remote area. It was fun, really. There was this big Bison ranch near their house, and a beautiful pregnant donkey, that sadly lived alone. Their wasn’t much people there, but that to me was a good thing. Kind of like a retreat. But with all getaways, there is always a down side, and in my case, it was a rather…uh, rancid book. A book called Stolen by Lucy Christopher, that my cousin let me read.

Plot Summary from the books website:

It happened like this. I was stolen from an airport. Taken from everything I knew, everything I was used to. Taken to sand and heat, dirt and danger. And he expected me to love him. This is my story. A letter from nowhere.

Told in a letter to her captor by 16-year-old Gemma, Stolen explores the influence that a really wild and remote space can have on the inner development of a young woman.

Gemma, a British city-living teenager, is kidnapped while on holiday with her parents. Her kidnapper, Ty, takes her to the wild land of outback Australia. To Gemma’s city-eyes, the landscape is harsh and unforgiving and there are no other signs of human life for hundreds of kilometres in every direction. Here, there is no escape. Gemma must learn to deal with her predicament, or die trying to fight it.

Ty, a young man, has other ideas for her. His childhood experience of living in outback Australia has forever changed the way he sees things. But he too has been living in the city; Gemma’s city. Unlike Gemma, however, he has had enough. In outback Australia he sees an opportunity for a new kind of life; a life more connected to the earth. He has been watching and learning about Gemma for many years; when he kidnaps her, his plan finally begins to take shape.

But Ty is not a stereotypical kidnapper and, over time, Gemma comes to see Ty in a new light, a light in which he is something more sensitive. The mysteries of Ty, and the mystery of her new life, start to take hold. She begins to feel something for her kidnapper when he wakes screaming in the night. Over the time spent with her captor, Gemma’s appreciation of him develops …but is this real love, or Stockholm Syndrome?

How cool is that? A book trailer!

Well, from this, it sounds pretty chappy. Stupid British girl get’s “stolen” by some troubled hot guy and taken to a house that’s pretty well sustained and right next to some paradise of life in the middle of the desert in between a couple of boulders.

One thing I absolutely could not stand was the annoying damsel in distress of a main character. Honestly I punched the book once out of annoyance. Ty consistently tells Gemma there are no people for hundreds of kilometers, yet she consistently tries to escape, to where the people are. I know maybe this could be a quality of hers, persistence. I might have seen it that way, if she weren’t so annoying about it.

And what doesn’t help is that she is a complete b****. Ty almost said so himself. Only if he let the whole word out. She doesn’t listen. “Gemma, don’t move you’re going to ruin every thing!” She moves and destroys something important. “Gemma, you can’t escape” Tries to escape, nearly destroys Ty’s car.

Another thing she does, is constantly say terrible things about her captor, when in reality he is not a bad person. A thousand times more decent than Gemma. Gemma is a stupid, xenophobic, drunk. That is exactly what she is. I myself am a city girl, but in no way am I like Gemma. A horrible, terrible, little girl she is.

Gosh, I don’t think I ever hated a book character more than her. I don’t think I ever hated a character at all. Maybe the book wouldn’t be so bad, if the character was a bit better. But there are numerous plot holes that add to the rancidness, such as Ty’s whereabouts. He says he was in Australia at one time, getting the house together, but he claims to have constantly watched her for years.

There isn’t any character development at all. Gemma is a b**** the whole book, until right at the end, but for such a quick change of heart, that would be either the result of Stockholm Syndrome, or very poor writing. And Ty doesn’t change much either, the only “change” there is, is when she starts to talk to him, he talks a lot more.

But it would be quite rude of me to write a review with only negative points, in fact that would be unfair. My favourite thing about this book, is camel that Ty catches and trains. Gemma is not a total idiot around the camel, likeable even. And everyone loves the silent character as well. If only Gemma was a bit more like the camel, easier to train, and obedient. Oh I would have loved this book.

When it comes down to it, I guess I should have stopped reading it by the time I reached the middle. But there is something about it that’s almost…captivating? I felt as if I couldn’t go on without knowing the rest. I guess I was attached to it in a way.

So, if you’re into poorly written love stories, with stupid main characters (Twilight fans?) go right a head and hit this book up. For the rest of you, please approach this book with caution.


Impressions on Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star

I know, most of us, including me were always taught not to judge a book by it’s cover, meaning don’t let appearances be the only factor to judge something on. And for the most part, I have followed this teaching. But this one movie, Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star, was one exception I just had to make.

Plot from Wikipedia:

The story centers on a small-town nerd who stumbles upon a family secret: His quiet and demure parents were famous porn stars in the 1970s. This motivates him to leave Northern Iowa for Hollywood, hoping to follow in their footsteps and fulfill his destiny as the biggest adult-film star in the world.

Well, it doesn’t sound great from the synopsis, but these two sentences, cannot explain just how awful it seems.

There is the trailer. Now you can kind of tell how bad it is.

One thing that really made me disregard seeing this is the over use of the already overused small penis joke. Oh gosh. Nobody really cares how large it is, the joke is over. Another thing is the typical confused, “stupid”, all over the place main character. And usually when movies use this archetype they usually fall into two groups: the lovable idiot, and the annoying idiot. I have a feeling Bucky is falling into the latter.

Well, for now I have deemed this movie as awful, but I will give it a fair chance and see it if I’m available. Oh gosh, I’m too kind. Once I do see it, I’ll give you what I really thought about. Because this post right here, is just my shallow pre-judging. The real deal comes out in theaters September 9th.